The Different Sides of Me
by bluebuttons
Summary: O.k. So a battle with slade goes wrong would be an understatement for what i have planned for this story. Slade hurts Raven, Beast Boy gets ticked off...oops, dont wanna give it away. Read and find out.


This fic takes place when the titans are about 18, so just play along with it. Also, it has allusions to the episodes _Birthmark _and _The Beast Within._ So if you haven't seen _Birthmark_, don't worry, it just has Slade back to life. (I figure that everyone has seen _The Beast Within _because it has been around forever.) I don't really know about everything for sure myself because I never saw the entire ending of _Birthmark_. So correct me if I am wrong, everyone else does! Enjoy (I hope!)

Raven stood on the roof of the titans tower, letting the oncoming darkness consume her. Watching the sunset, she stood in complete silence soaking in the events from the day, contemplating each moment, focusing on one part of the day in particular.

'Did he really mean what he said?' she asked herself trying to recover the slightly damaged memory.

Flashback 

Raven flew over Jump City at top speed beside her favorite green friend and landed in front of the library next to the other three titans.

"Titans, go!" Robin wailed at the top of his lungs as he drew his bow staff. Flinging himself at Slade, he tripped over his own overly enlarged shoes.

"Uahhhhhhh!" Raven yelled as she blasted the insane man before her with a nearby bus as Starfire bent down to help the pointy haired weasel on the ground.

Slade easily moved out of the way of the bus hurtling toward him. "Is that the best you've got? Or are you still trying to control yourself?" He asked her in that calm voice that overwhelmed her with fury and hatred.

"GET OUT OF MY MIND!" she screamed at herself, collapsing to the ground holding her head like it was going to explode.

"Raven, silly Raven, don't try to fight it. You know you love that power." Came his smooth voice.

"Do not hurt our friend Raven! You have tormented her for the last time!" Starfire screamed as she vigorously threw badly aimed starbolts at Slade who was broken away from infiltrating Raven's mind like Trigon had taught him, and was forced to run like a mad man (Oh wait, he already is one! Never mind) to avoid the unpredictable reign of fire from the alien girl.

Eventually Slade figured out that she was just going to keep trying to blast him away, so he flipped up onto a nearby building. Trying to regain his composure, he never saw Cyborg come from behind with his sonic cannon. He took the hit head on and was forcefully blasted back a good 20 yards.

Struggling to his feet he was caught by surprise by an angry Robin who sent him a furry of heavy punches. Dodging each one narrowly, he disintegrated and reappeared behind Robin and threw him a punch that hit him right in the kisser. (That sounds so funny)

Meanwhile Starfire and Beast boy were trying to comfort a very pained Raven.

"Raven, you are positive that Slade did not harm you?"

"Yes, I'll be fine" was her slow reply.

"Glorious, I shall go and assist the others in the subduing of Slade."

"I'll stay here and protect Raven, Star. You can go if you wanna."

"Beast boy, you don't have to stay I just have to…."

"There is no way I'm leaving you down here by yourself Raven." He told her as Star flew off. "Com'on. Let me help you up" he told her in a concerned tone and offered his hand.

"Beast boy, I'm going to be fine, go help. It looks like they're taking some pretty bad hits," she told him as she watched Robin fall to the concrete and cringed, whether it was from the battle going on in her head or if she really felt bad for Robin who hopped back up unbelievably quick, he couldn't tell. "I'll be up in a minute. Go." She said forcefully.

He looked at her regretfully, but turned into a hawk and went to help the others like she had ordered him.

Slowly standing Raven tried to get a better grip on reality. 'How did he get in my mind like that? Was he talking to my father?' She concentrated hard as her feet left the ground and she slowly hovered upward to the fight going on at the rooftop of some unlucky office building. Slade saw her coming while wrestling with a green tiger, and threw him off with ease. His temper was rising quickly, but he remained calm on the surface.

"Like my new party trick Raven? I do _birthdays _too."

Just the way he said birthdays was enough to make her puke all over herself. "Stay out of my head. There are things in there that mortals aren't meant to mess with." She called over to him icily.

"Oh, my friend Raven, I know what's in your mind, I know exactly how to make it come out. You'll lose control, just like you always do every single time I get to your head, and then I will be able to get what I went. You know, Raven, you really are quite vulnerable when you're asleep. You're loosing control now, aren't you little Raven. You know, I do quite like your father. Believe me, he does know what's best for his baby girl."

She felt her anger rising. She had to keep control. He knew how to get to her. "Don't tell me about my father. You don't know him."

"Oh no Raven, I think I know him very well."

The other titans just stared at the two. Raven had now landed on the roof and was facing Slade. Beast boy was the only one who saw it coming. He ran to Raven's side, and tried to calm her down, but there was nothing for it. Raven had had all she could take from this man, lecturing her about her father. He had been in her mind while she was sleeping. It infuriated and disgusted her. She felt the rage and compulsion surging through her veins. She felt all of her emotions slipping from her grasp.

"Leave. Me. ALOOOONE!" she screamed loudest that she could. Black energy erupted from her eyes, mouth, and hands. The city was engulfed in a black casing and Beast boy was thrown from her side.

As he was flung away and landed heavily, through the confusion of it all, Raven heard him saying, "Raven, please, I cant loose you! You have to get control!…." His voice seemed to pierce though her inward struggle. His words were surprisingly calming and even though she didn't comprehend a thing he was saying, it all seemed to be all right. For a second.

There was more he was telling her but she couldn't hear it because there was a disturbance, even more than usual when she lost control.

'Slade.' Was her last thought before she lost perception.

The black energy evaporated and Raven's near lifeless body fell to the ground and hit with a sickening _thump. _

"Raven!" Beast boy screamed, anger and concern both existing heavily in his voice. He was irate. Slade had to go, and he had to go now. He had screwed his Raven for the last time. Ever. He completely lost control and there was no stopping him. He had to pay for hurting his Raven. He had never told anyone but inside the corner of his mind Raven was special to him. Her mysterious ways and her need for separation had drawn him in and now he might not be able to tell her, ever. She was his favorite out of all the titans. All these thoughts raced through his head as the beast took over. Hell's fire blazed in his emerald eyes.

Slade had realized what was happening, while still trying to penetrate Raven's idol mind. He immediately stopped and started running with pure fear in his eyes. He frantically tried to throw off the beast by chucking anything he could find. Most of the heavy pipes and other debris hit the beast square in the chest, but none of it seemed to take effect. He had to kill the man who had made Raven hurt so bad for so long.

The beast caught up with him and started to gorge his petrified body.

Raven returned to consciousness, very weak and very confused, just in time to see this amazing display put up by the enraged Beast boy. She watched in pure confusion for several moments and lost consciousness again.

After Slade had been ripped into several unrecognizable pieces, Beast boy returned to his human form and collapsed but got back up immediately after seeing Raven faint again. Within seconds he was up and at her side, disregarding all of his severe cuts and bruises, he gently cradled her delicate head in his arms. Tears streaming down his face he whispered to the girl in his lap "Raven, no, don't go. He's gone. I lost control and he's gone. You have to wake up. I never got to tell you. You have to wake up! I have to tell you! Damn it Raven! Come back! It was so fucking scary, I lost control, but I was glad I did. I wish I could have helped you sooner. It's all my fault that you got hurt. I'm so sorry. I should have been there to help you. But he's gone, and he can never hurt you again. Please Raven, I'm begging you, you have to come back to me! I need you!" He was now screaming and shaking involuntarily.

He felt her move in his lap and instantly relaxed. She had not woken up, but fallen into a deep sleep from exhaustion. "Oh, Raven. You're ok. Don't scare me like that." He whispered into her ear.

The other titans hadn't moved at all since Raven lost control, but were directing a gaze of awe at the mangled body, well no longer body, of Slade.

After just sitting and stroking he hair for a few moments Beast Boy picked up the sleeping Raven, and turned to the other titans "Lets get her home guys."

The slightly intimidated team was still speechless but nodded and followed Beast Boy to the stairs that led off the top of the building in an awkward silence.

Back at the tower Best Boy gently laid Raven down on her bed and sat down to wait until she woke up.

In her head she played the image over and over again. Beast Boy attacking Slade with everything he had. Over and over again she heard his words, trying to calm her and his tears falling on her face as she watched herself from the outside. 'Did he really feel that way?' the dream Raven asked herself out loud.

A dream Beast Boy appeared "Yes, I do Raven. All of it is true. I really care about you, just like you always wanted." He told her seductively in the midst of the struggle still taking place below.

The dream Raven felt for that one second in her life, pure bliss and ignorance to the quickly changing world around her. She was so wrapped up in her newfound happiness that she never saw what was coming next. She embraced the body that was where Beast Boy had stood mere seconds before without realizing what he had become. His touch burned her but she held him still. She looked up into the face that she thought was Beast Boys, but instead into the face of her father. Stumbling backwards with the most sickening feeling in her stomach, she tried to scream but nothing came out. Her father's figure just stood there, laughing at her with Slade standing nearby. She could feel her voice straining but there was no sound at all. She felt everything closing in around her, the sudden lack of oxygen getting to her brain and making her feel light-headed. She desperately tried to grab on to anything, anything at all but there was nothing to hold on to. She felt her grasp on "reality" slipping.

Raven woke up crying and screaming. The sweat beads forming on her face trickled down her cheeks. Looking around, she was completely disoriented and bewildered. She turned to see Beast Boy, asleep on her bead. She screamed, remembering the dream and encased him in a black aura. Waking up slowly, Beast Boy realized that he was no longer on Raven's bed.

"Rae! Snap out of it! It's me, Beast Boy! What are you doing? Rae!"

She collapsed again letting him fall on the floor. "I'm sorry Beast Boy, it's just that you, you really scared me."

"Scared you! You're the one that passed out! You scared the crap out of me, because I thought you were gone and I never got to tell you…-gasp- uh, huh huh, oops"

"I'm sorry beast boy I had this dream. Trigon is angry and Slade is still alive. You were there and then it wasn't you and it was him. And oh I'm just so glad that you're ok." She fell into his welcoming arms and buried her face in his toned chest.

The two just sat there, Raven crying into his arms and him occasionally patting her on the back in a comforting manner.

"So Slade isn't dead?"

"No, somehow he is still out there. I don't know how, but he is."

"Damn it. I thought I finally helped you for once instead of screwing up. For once I thought that I could be your hero."

"Beast boy, you're my hero everyday. I thought you knew."

"I always thought you hated me. I always blamed myself because you locked yourself in your room and never did anything with the team. I thought that it was all my fault. And everyday I told myself that one day I would find a way to make it up to you. Then when I thought I killed Slade I thought I had done it for you. And I was so happy. But I guess I just failed. I just always cared about you in a special way, Raven and I couldn't stand to see him hurting you. I thought I was making it so he could never hurt you again, but I just screwed up again. I'm so sorry Raven. I always wanted to be there for you, but you pushed me away and my one great chance to prove to you that I wasn't a complete idiot and I just screwed you even more."

"No, you didn't. First of all you are not a _complete_ idiot all the time. And none of this is your fault. I stayed in my room so I couldn't hurt you. And no matter how much you tell yourself that you are a screw-up and even if you have all this self-pity you are still my hero, every hour of every day. And you always will be." Her lip wavering as she spoke.

"I'm so sorry this happened Rae," he told her in a voice full of sorrow, as if he thought that he could have done something to change it.

"Don't blame yourself."

"Thanks Rae. I'll always care about you."

"You too" she said softly as she rested her head on his shoulder. She looked up into his green eyes "And Beast Boy,"

"Yeah Rae?"

"Don't call me Rae."

"You got it Rae." He quickly got up and kissed her on the cheek as he turned toward the door and walked out, stopping at the doorway to look back and make sure what he had done was ok. He could tell by the look on Raven's face, she had wanted it almost as much as he had, if not more. "We'll work this out."

The door hissed shut and Raven touched her cheek. It felt so warm and so perfect. Standing slowly she reached out with her powers to open the door but it didn't open. She tried again. Still nothing happened to the door. She tried to teleport through the floor and still nothing happened. She screamed.

Cliffhanger, what do ya think chicos y chicas? Good? Bad? Continue? Let me know!


End file.
